FRIENEMIES

Everyone has one or two.How many do you have? (Smiles) you have no idea right? When you’re done reading you would.

Hmmm FRIENEMIES 😑It’s coined from FRIENDS + ENEMIES.

A frienemy is someone who is both a friend and an enemy.A frienemy-Someone who pretends to be close friends but is actually a rival.

They’re very supportive and complimentary most times to the excess. Yea,they are never tired of complimenting you even when it’s not needed.They rush to view your Facebook,whatsapp,Instagram stories wowing upandan.Their comments revolves around (My crush,my love,finest,she’s so cute,wow etc).They sleep and wake on your walls,Usually between the first three comments on your posts.We could call them monitoring agents

They’re ready to defend you on social medias even without being tagged they just know how to find their way,same person would bitch about you , your life and most importantly your relationship behind your back to anyone who cares to listen.

These “frienemies” can not stand to see you happy without them and are worried they will never have something special like you do.There’s root of jealousy in all they do

They’d interfare in your relationship and say they’re acting in your best interest.Hmm they’re terrible😑

Now Let’s get to know some Indicators that shows you have a frienemy or Let’s just call it 👇🏼

CHARACTERISTICS OF FRIENEMIES

1.Constant Attention

Frienemies often crave intimacy in a relationship and wants to be your bestie five minutes after you meet.They source for your WhatsApp number and start texting all in the same day.I had one who even went as far as renaming our messenger chat with “Best of friends”.

They want to be too close too soon

2.Over Sharing

Frienemies would tell you their life story including personal details with the first 3 days of your chats or meeting.

3.Digging up dirt

Frienemies feed on negative information and always dig for more.

If you say you’re a bit down, they’ll want to know why.W as it a fight with your boyfriend? Are you depressed? How is it going? Feel free to share

At first you’d feel good to have someone who remembers what’s happening in your life and cares.In time,you’d notice it’s a pure negative exercise.Worse,this behavior would be spiritualized with statements like,”I just want to know how to pray for you”.

Real friends show concern about your personal problems but allow you a measure of privacy

Frienemies look for the sore spots in your life and put their hands

4.When you have a little misunderstanding,you get to see the devil in disguise.They spit fire,they say all they had in mind about you.My dear you’d be surprised.The worse is they fully know they’re at fault yet they’ll go to your friends and spoil you before them.They like playing the pity card, always want to be seen as the innocent one.Sincerely,they’re evil.

Sadly,this are the type of friends you ought to cut off but won’t because they’re nice,you’ve had good times with.

You know they’re good people that you can count on to bring you down in the nearest future.You know the person will continue to bring you down till you demand better for yourself

You’re fully aware such relationship is toxic,fraught with risks and mistrust yet you still hold on.

Well,You’re not crazy cause I was in your shoes not until yesterday,I finally had a reason to call it a stop.Words I got weren’t something I wish anyone including you reading this to come across.I’m fine anyway😊

(Breaths out)

Let’s see some ways of letting go of such friendships

We’re not at fault but it’s mandatory to meet those kinda people.You just can’t help it but you could manage it and turn them down gently.

First,When they get angry and begin spitting fire.Never! I repeat Never! Exchange words with them just let them be.But listen kinely more often than not the words spoken or written are bottled up emotions about you.Stay calm,cool and collected

Secondly,Drift away from such friendship.Become subtly less and less available until they aren’t part of your life any more.Don’t respond to their texts right away.

Finally,Play it safe by ending the relationship gently. When gently ending the relationship try saying something like :

“While I care about you I don’t think we’re great for each other.I think it would be healthier for us to go our separate ways”

It’s better sent as a text,don’t bother replying or have pity on them.They’re experts in acting repentive.

I’m saying this out of experience.same person I had pity on sometime last year who kept pleading and pleading she’s sorry still used it against me.

It’s better to be named being proud or arrogate that being everyone’s friend who’s dying inside

Some people would say beware of enemies,some beware of friends but I’d say beware of frienemies who would hurt you and still play the victim

Good Evening!